


yadnuS ymoolG s'otokaM

by InterstellarVagabond



Series: Cry at Despair in the Name of Hope [2]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Despair, F/F, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:07:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25684006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InterstellarVagabond/pseuds/InterstellarVagabond
Summary: Makoto watched a special video that opened his eyes to despair. In one timeline it tore him apart from the inside, made him attempt suicide endlessly until he was able to find hope again. In this timeline he finds his destiny in despair.With a plan to end the suffering of watching friends die one by one, Makoto reunites his class and two representatives from the Remnants of Despair to bring the killing game back once more.
Relationships: Asahina Aoi/Ogami Sakura, Fukawa Touko/Naegi Komaru, Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito, Kirigiri Kyoko/Naegi Makoto/Togami Byakuya, Kuzuryu Fuyuhiko/Soda Kazuichi
Series: Cry at Despair in the Name of Hope [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1862452
Comments: 21
Kudos: 105





	1. Welcome Home!

**Author's Note:**

> You don't have to read Makoto's Gloomy Sunday for this to make sense but it was the original and inspiration for this one!

“Really, this is unnecessary,” Kyoko sighed as the shock blanket was draped around her shoulders. 

“You were legally dead,” Byakuya huffed, concern driven contempt obvious in his voice. “Don’t make any trouble for my people, they may be my underlings but they still outrank you.”

“B-but they don’t?” Makoto pointed out with a shy laugh. “Kyoko is in charge of a lot.”

“Don’t give her any ideas,” Byakuya scolded him. “I have to go attend to the rest of this mess, you two don’t get into anymore killing games in the five minutes I’m gone.”

“Heh, he’s really getting nicer, huh?” Makoto chuckled as they watched Byakuya walk away. 

“I suppose you could call it that,” Kyoko said, raising an eyebrow. 

She felt Makoto’s hand slip into hers, and turned to see a soft smile on his face. He was looking at her with all the love in the world as he reached down and slowly removed her glove.

Her eyebrows shot up at the uncharacteristic breach of trust, but… she had scared him. Perhaps he was still shaken, needed this physical closeness. Makoto was a great deal more affectionate than her and Byakuya, his actions often puzzled her, so she decided to let it slide. 

“I’m glad you’re okay,” he said, interlocking their fingers. 

“As am I.”

He lay his head on her shoulder, closing his eyes, and she smiled faintly. She turned her eyes to the sunset, and therefore missed it when Makoto opened his eyes.

Wild, despair filled eyes.

  
  


“Hajime! You’re going to make us late!” Nagito called, hands cupped around his mouth as he shouted from the front gates.

“We still have ten minutes!” Hajime tried to catch up, despite the fact that Nagito had saddled him with both of their bags. Just as expected, his excitement over the reopening ceremony for Hope’s Peak had given him a hell of a one track mind.

“Jeez, it’s like you don’t even care. This is your first chance to really see the main course building you realize,” Nagito sighed.

“I should have left you at home,” Hajime replied, rolling his eyes. 

“I would never have forgiven you,” Nagito said seriously.

“I know.” Hajime knocked their shoulders lightly together. “Well? C’mon, now you’re making me wait. Try and keep up!”

He was maybe cheating a little using Kamukura’s talents to outrun Nagito, especially since Nagito was a former cancer patient with the muscle mass of a blade of grass who didn’t really need any special talent in an opponent to be outran, but regardless he delighted in hearing the outraged yet admiring exclamation from behind him as he took off. 

Of course Nagito had a talent of his own, unpredictable and fickle, and it seemed his luck had turned for the better because Hajime ended up skidding to a halt on his heels-arms pinwheeling-as he tried to avoid running into Kyoko. Nagito ended up running right into Hajime’s back however, the equivalent exchange for his good luck. 

Kyoko raised an eyebrow. “...”

“S-sorry!” Hajime smiled sheepishly.

“Not to worry, the same thing just happened with a different pair of children,” she replied, tucking some hair behind her ear. Nagito giggled at the barb, while Hajime shot him a stern look over his shoulder. “The headmaster is waiting for you inside.”

“Wow, can you imagine being able to call your partner the headmaster of Hope’s Peak?” Nagito sighed dreamily.

“I’m the  _ ultimate hope _ !” Hajime protested.

“One of, and not the very popular one,” Nagito argued. 

Kyoko shook her head with an amused smile. Hajime noticed and blushed, his sheepish smile returning.

“Thanks, we’ll head right in,” he said apologetically, adjusting to hold both suitcases with one hand so he could take Nagito’s hand and drag him inside. 

“Like wild animals, those remnants,” Byakua commented as he joined Kyoko, Hina and Toko trailing behind him. “I don’t see the appeal but if Makoto is soft on them then…”

“Aw, I think they’re sweet,” Hina said. 

“I-I bet that one with the white hair is i-into some really weird stuff…” Toko murmured, chewing on her sleeve. 

“Be quiet,” Byakuya sighed. “Where is your handler?”

“Her  _ girlfriend _ couldn’t make it,” Hina corrected him. “Komaru got some sorta stomach bug.”

“Makoto will be so disappointed she can’t make it,” Kyoko said.

“Well, we can’t very well delay for one person. The Togami Corporation has invested a lot of money into this project. Quite a bit, actually. You’d think Makoto was supplying the dorm rooms with golden toilets and diamond chandeliers.”

“Since when is money an object to you! You know there’s people still homeless and starving out there, you shouldn’t complain!” Hina pointed out. 

“Can we just go inside already?” Toko whined. “It’s so hot out here…”

Makoto ran a hand over the headmaster’s desk, admiring the polished wood. It was the same one Kyoko’s father had once sat at, restored to its former glory. He imagined it caused her so much pain to see.

The ceremony would start soon. It had to go perfectly, he’d put so much work into it. Of course if it failed that would be fine, after all he knew better than to hope for things to go right. Still, he wanted to taste the despair he’d planned for himself and his friends. 

There was a knock at the door, so he put on his hopeful smile. “Come in!”

Kyoko entered, moving to his side to place a gentle hand on his shoulder, her equivalent of a kiss. “Komaru is sick, she can’t make it.”

His smile wavered.

“That’s fine, I hope she’s okay!” he said, forcibly happy. Having his sister involved… that would have really made things better…

If he knew that all the important people in his life were doomed to die, then he’d be secure in his despair, he’d never feel the pain of hope again. 

Still. So much work went into this, he couldn’t delay for just one person.

“Hinata and Komaeda have made it, I told them you wanted to see them but I believe they were distracted by the classrooms.”

“Nagito was so happy to hear about the school reopening, I don’t mind if he takes a little tour,” Makoto laughed. 

“I’ll make sure they’re where they need to be when the ceremony starts.” Kyoko smiled.

“I better get ready too!” Makoto practically bounced with excitement. “I’ll see you in the gym, please… gather everyone there?”

She nodded, and he reached for her hand.

He pressed their palms together and met her gaze, an action that almost made her look away, but she tried to meet his gaze anyway. She didn’t do eye contact, but Makoto did. She wouldn’t sacrifice her own preferences and needs for him, of course, but she was willing to indulge him now and then. After all, he’d always done the same for her.

Still, lately he’d been… a bit more affectionate. He often did this, pressing their hands together and looking into her eyes, almost like he wanted to see her unwavering gaze as he drew attention to her scars. Perhaps… he wanted her to be more open and comfortable with him. 

She told herself that, anyway.

“I love you,” he said warmly. “Tell Byakuya the same if you see him first?”

“I will. I love you too.”

He smiled, eyes closing, then he left for the gym.

  
  


The ceremony was mostly virtual, with people tuning in from all over the world to watch from the cameras they’d set up in the gym. The only people actually in attendance were those personally invited by Makoto. It was considered a safety measure, ironically enough. Not having a lot of people in the building where The Tragedy began… it was to keep them safe.

So they could witness what was to come.

Not that Makoto cared too much for the opinion of the world. Still, it was what She had done and he was going to replace Her so…

His motivations were a bit more selfish, but he couldn’t sacrifice everything for that.

His friends applauded politely as he took the stage at the podium, Nagito clapping quite enthusiastically. He smiled and waved for the cameras, looking bashful and joyous. 

“Thank you!” he said as the applause died down. “I’m so glad all of you are here with me today.”

He looked at the crowd: Byakuya, Toko, Hina, Yasuhiro, Kyoko, Hajime, Nagito. If only Komaru could have attended as well, and some more of the remnants and members of the Future Foundation as well. Oh well. Better to have some than none at all.

“Hope’s Peak taught me many things,” he said, placing a hand over his heart. “Our dear friend, the late Yukizome, once said that what was great about this school is that it gave you a chance to form memories with your friends. I think she knew exactly what it was that makes this school special: the people.” he moved one hand subtly down to the podium where a red button stood out against the wood. With Byakuya’s money he was able to make all sorts of progress. There were some things that were impossible: no one in their right mind would be caught manufacturing a Monokuma even for a great deal of money, but a “security system” for the school? After all that had happened to it? No one doubted the need for that. 

“I’m so lucky… truly lucky… to be here with these people today,” he said, his finger circling the button. “In fact.. I’d like to invite you all to a Hope’s Peak class reunion! A reunion… that will last a lifetime.”

“Huh?” Kyoko suddenly felt strange, something was off about Makoto. She didn’t get the chance to think any further than that though, because then Makoto hit the button and the lights went out. 

  
  


“...nnh?”

Hajime woke with a pounding headache, his vision blurring. When he raised a hand to his head he noticed a thick bangle on his wrist. 

“What…?” he brought it closer to his eyes, squinting as he ran a finger over it. At his touch the bangle lit up, a message flashing across its surface:

_ Using your talents. _

“What is this…?” it seemed familiar, but his head was pounding so hard he couldn’t think straight. 

“Hah…?” 

He heard a voice next to him and sat up to see Nagito: pale and tired looking, sitting up next to him.

It looked like they were on a bed, one of the dorm room beds. They had been planning to stay in the dorms during their visit, since hotel rooms were mostly used to house those displaced by The Tragedy these days. Did they… go too hard at the celebration? Was that why his head hurt? Why he didn’t remember going to bed?

That didn’t explain the bangle though.

“Hajime?” Nagito sounded so vulnerable that it pulled Hajime from his thoughts. He reached out to help him sit up, pulling Nagito up to lean on him. 

“Hey… what happened?” he asked.

“I’m not sure…” Nagito admitted, looking thoughtful even as he winced.

“Do you have…?” Hajime raised his arm to display the bangle and Nagito’s eyes widened. He checked his arms and shook his head. 

“Just you, but Hajime, isn’t that-?”

Whatever he had been about to say was cut off by a familiar sound. 

_ Ding dong, dong ding! _

Hajime’s blood ran cold as his eyes fell on the screen in the corner of the room.

There was no image, just static and darkness, but a voice addressed them.

“Hey, could everyone please reconvene in the gym? Sorry for the trouble!”

The screen shut off and Nagito’s eyes widened with horror.

“Hajime… was that…?” 

“It wasn’t Monokuma.”

“No! I know that, I meant… was that  _ Makoto _ ?”

“Huh…” Hajime hadn’t really paid attention to the voice, he’d been too distracted by the pain and the confusion. “I… I don’t know.”

“We have to go to the gym.” he tried to stand and fell immediately to his knees. Hajime made a sound of distress and moved to help him up. 

“I’m fine.” Nagito pushed his hands away and stood on his own, stubborn and a bit petulant. “We need to go. Don’t waste time.”

Hajime sighed, a bit frustrated, but he went to the door anyway.

Out in the hallway it seemed other people were waking up as well. Hajime saw Hina stumble out of a room and bump into Hiro, who screeched and jumped back like she’d burned him.

“W-what is this?” he cried out. “Did we travel back in time?”

“Of course not!” Hina said. “But… what did happen?”

“What is the meaning of this?” Byakuya demanded as though any of them had the answer. Toko was currently yanking at her hair and making distressed noises, while Kyoko was steadying herself with a hand against the wall. Hajime soon noticed he was the only one wearing a bangle. 

“S-should we go to the gym?” Hiro asked.

“Right, like t-that worked out so well for us last time,” Toko hissed. “Use that moldy brain you have in your head, idiot!”

“You haven’t gotten nicer at all!” Hiro wailed.

“Everyone… please be quiet,” Hajime groaned, pressing his hand to his head.

“Headache?” Kyoko guessed.

“Yeah. You too?” 

“I suspect we were drugged. Some kind of gas maybe. No one remembers what happened?” she said, and the others all shook their heads.

“Last thing I remember, Naegister was giving his speech. Then…” Hiro shrugged.

“Where is Makoto?” Byakuya asked, his tone stern so it wouldn’t sound as concerned as he was.

Kyoko could guess at that, though she held onto the hope that she was wrong. “Maybe we’ll find him if we go to the gym,” she sighed.

“We have to go right now,” Nagito agreed. 

They started the walk, and for those of them that had been present for the killing game that occurred in these halls… their legs shook with each step towards such a familiar destination. 

Once at the gym, Byakuya moved to stand close to Kyoko. She seemed to pull away a bit, but he insisted. Without Makoto there the two of them were at the mercy of their own feelings and habits. He’d just prefer it if they stayed close to each other.

For a moment they all expected a teddy bear to shoot up from the floor and land on the podium, to laugh at them and declare a killing game.

What happened instead was the lights dimmed, and a familiar figure took the stage.

“Makoto?” Byakuya gasped in surprise. 

Makoto smiled and waved. He was dressed in his new uniform, a near match to Junko’s iconic outfit with a few tweaks for his body and preferred presentation. He held a worn plushie in his arms, obviously a black and white bear, and on his head he wore a crown (he’d always secretly thought that was a nice touch, right?)

“So everyone’s awake?” he asked, rocking from his heels to his toes a few times. “How do you feel? Sorry about the gas, I needed to take care of our special friend, and I knew you guys would interfere if you saw me putting the bangle on him.”

“Y-you mean this?” Hajime asked, raising his arm.

“What’s going on?” Hina demanded. “You drugged us all to give Hajime one of those horrible bracelets?”

“Not Hajime.” Makoto wagged his finger with a tsk tsk. “Izuru. It would be troublesome if he crashed the party. Hajime can stay and do as he pleases, but if I see Izuru… well, you all saw what happened at the last killing game!”

“Take this thing off!” Hajime demanded. “I don’t know what the hell is going on, but it’s fucked!”

“I was just about to explain!” Makoto sighed. “You really are so impatient, but that’s just kinda one of your charms, right?”

Byakuya looked over to Kyoko and saw that she didn’t look surprised, only… pained. 

“So, I guess I should start with an explanation,” Makoto said happily. “Back at the Future Foundation killing game, I watched a very special video, and it opened my eyes! I learned some very important things.” he took a few steps, the heels of his boots clacking against the stage. “Firstly, everyone I have ever loved will one day die. Secondly, I have to be there to see it with my own eyes. I can’t commit suicide! I have to be there to watch as each and everyone of the people closest to me breathes their last breath…” he squeezed the plushie extra tight, shivering. “Because… if pain is inevitable… if the world will always inevitably change for the worse… then hope is just delaying things. I can see that now… I can see that it’s so much better to just embrace that pain before it can break you! Break first! Become pain! Become… despair…” his eyes were wild and dark as he looked at them. “So please, if you would, call me… The Ultimate Despair. The Enoshima Heir.”

“Y-you too?” Toko yanked at her hair. “Why d-does everyone want to become that bitch?”

“Makoto, stop this!” Byakuya ordered. “To think you’d be weak enough to get brainwashed like that… inexcusable!” his hand shook as he pointed an accusing finger at him. 

“Please, I’m trying to explain.” Makoto smiled. “See, I want us all to experience a true killing reunion, but I don’t want to rush things. I want your deaths to be unexpected, random, painful. Just like all our other friends…” he looked almost lovesick for a moment. “So… I want you all to live here with me until Hope’s Peak Academy welcomes it’s 79th class… a class of killers eager to take you all from me.”

He felt despair soaking into his body. He’d left their memories intact because he needed them to feel it too. He needed them to know the pain of a close friend leaving their life, not just a friend of a few days. His eyes fell on Kyoko and… yes, this was despair indeed. Her eyes… was she angry with him? Ashamed? Disappointed? He couldn’t tell. 

“Until our new students arrive, please… just make yourselves at home! I’ve stocked the warehouse, the library, everything you could want for a peaceful life of slow death.”

“No!” 

Makoto’s eyes moved to the person who’d just shouted at him. “Hm? Nagito? Are you not happy here with me?”

“No, this is wrong!” Nagito said, disgust dripping from his voice. “This is… this is…” he wrapped his arms around himself, looking ill. 

“Aww… we’d made so much progress with your beliefs,” Makoto sighed. “It looks like you’re back to seeing things in black and white. Well, I guess that works for me… puhuhuhu!” he wiggled the Monokuma plush’s paw to make it look like he was waving. “Anyway, please, go ahead and get used to your new home.”

“No way are we doing this again!” Hina shouted, running towards the stage.

Makoto frowned and pulled a remote out from his pocket, pressing a button. Suddenly a pair of machine guns descended from the ceiling and took aim at her. She skidded to a stop and looked at them with wide eyes. 

“I’d hate to kill you now. It would have such little meaning… then again, that would make it that much more despairful, huh?” Makoto drooled at the idea. “Go ahead then, if that’s what you want. I want all my friends to be happy before they die!”

“Y-you’re sick…” her heart wasn’t in the insult, she was really just informing him that he was in fact sick, that something was wrong with him. This wasn’t the Makoto she knew. 

“I have to get going. I have to take care of my duties as headmaster, I’m sure you understand.” he smiled at them all, eyes swirling with despair. “Take care, everyone.”

He just walked away, calmly, like nothing strange had happened at all. 

“Ngh!” Kyoko clenched her hands tightly into fists. “I’m a fool.”

“Hey… you couldn’t have known…” Hiro tried weakly to comfort her. 

“Are you kidding? O-of course she could have known!” Toko accused. “Ultimate detective? C-c’mon! How could you not see your own boyfriend going crazy?”

“This is my fault,” Kyoko agreed. “The signs were all there. I just… I had… hoped…”

“Lay off,” Hajime told Toko. “Despair… it can happen to anyone, and those who watch one of Enoshima’s videos… it’s a guarantee. Not one person has overcome them without help.”

“H-hey… you can’t get us out of here, can you?” Hiro asked him nervously. “You know, all Kamukura style?”

“I wouldn’t even have time to disassemble the bracelet before it pumped the poison into my system,” Hajime pointed out. He then froze as a familiar peal of laughter hit his ears. He turned to see Nagito… in bad shape. 

`He was hunched over with his arms wrapped around himself as his whole body shook with laughter. His eyes were full of tears. 

_ This can’t be easy for him… even after all the change he’s gone through, to see his hero turn out this way… _ Hajime moved to Nagito’s side and helped him stand up straight. 

“I have to get him somewhere quiet,” he said. “... we can meet up later, right?”

“The dining hall,” Byakuya agreed quietly. “As usual.”

Hina choked on a sob, and it looked like they all felt the same way.

Despair was nothing in the face of grief and fear. 


	2. Free Time Event

Makoto lifted the picture frame on his desk so he could better look at it. It was a picture of him with his partners and his sister, the day they’d all finally met up after it all. He sighed.

“I really wanted to kill you with my own hands,” he addressed the Komaru in the picture. “You couldn’t be Junko, but I can. You can be my Mukuro… I’ll save you from watching me die. I’ll kill you first before you can feel that pain.”

He would simply have to include her in the 79th class. 

Speaking of which, it was time to scout. 

He spun the office chair a few times with an excited shout before kicking against the desk to send the chair rolling over to the surveillance camera set up in the corner. He smiled into it and waved.

“Hope’s Peak Academy is open for the fall semester!” he declared. “To all those talented in despair… or hope! Whatever it is that makes you kill… please! We’d love to have you.”

He suddenly winced, the Monokuma plush falling out of his lap. He could hear a voice in his head shouting at him.

_ What are you doing? Stop this! _

“I do it… or someone else does…” he muttered to himself, thinking about the grand despair of the world’s savior falling apart on camera. “If I don’t kill them someone else will… and wouldn’t that be worse? I want that despair all to myself…” He stared down at his hand. “... I wonder what it would have felt like… if I’d killed Sayaka before she tried to frame me… before she died and left me…”

_ Pain is no excuse for apathy! For despair! You have to keep fighting! Hope is something you keep alive, not because it’s easy, but because it- _

“SHUT UP!” he ripped at his hair, his crown falling to the ground as he wailed and jerked forward hard enough that his head hit the surveillance camera. 

The camera and its tripod fell to the ground with a thud, and Makoto felt blood trickling down his forehead. He stuck his tongue out to catch a drop.

  
  
  
  


“Shit, shit, shit, shit!” 

Kazuichi ran to the restaurant, holding the portable TV he’d salvaged from Electric Avenue close to his chest. He almost tripped, recovered, and kept running. 

“Are you guys seeing this?” he screeched as he entered the restaurant, only to be shushed by his friends who were all facing the plasma screen installed on the wall. 

“I-I can’t believe this…” Akane said, shaking her head. “He saved us, right? How could he end up like us?”

“This shit happens,” Nekomaru told her. “Still, there’s gotta be something we can do.”

“Yeah! We can’t just sit here like cowards after all he did for us!” Mahiru chimed in.

“B-but we have no boat… r-remember?” Mikan sobbed. “H-he cut us off from the m-mainland…”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Akane panicked. “You mean we’re gonna  _ starve _ ?”

“If we cannot get supplies, eventually, yes.” Peko adjusted her glasses.

“That’s not what’s fucking important right now!” Fuyuhiko huffed. “Hajime and Nagito are trapped over there!”

“Kazuichi!” Sonia shouted suddenly, pointing over to the mechanic. “How soon can you build a boat or plane?”

“W-what? With what we have here?” he tugged at his beanie. “I-I dunno… like… I dunno! Okay? I have no idea if we even have the parts!”

“Quit bullying my boyfriend, princess,” Fuyuhiko sighed. “Just go check, Kaz?”

“Roger!” Kazuichi saluted stiffly, before running off again. 

“Truly… the demons of despair have risen again, and without our bidding…” Gundham said darkly, voice muffled somewhat by his scarf. “We are free from eternal judgement… but have no control…”

“No control at all?” Ibuki shouted. “C’mon! I bet we could still pull some strings! If we got back to the mainland we could just lie our faces off and get back on team despair just in time to WHAM! BAM! OH NO? DE-DESPAIR MAKOTO!”

The Imposter put a gentle hand on Mitarai’s shoulder, seeing him shake. “Eat your breakfast,” he ordered gently. “Going hungry won’t help.”

“She’s got a point.” Fuyuhiko winced at Ibuki’s volume and turned to Peko. “What’s the latest from the yakuza?”

“They’ve been silent since our capture,” she sighed. 

“Well, I’ll see about Kaz boosting our communications. We’ll see if we can get some help going. Just until we get there of course, I don’t intend on letting my connections do all the work.”

“Ugh, I can’t hear the broadcast over all your yapping and Mikan’s gross mouth breathing!” Hiyoko shouted.

“I’m sorry!” Mikan broke down, sobbing into her hands. 

It didn’t seem to matter whether she could hear the broadcast or not though, because Makoto had just slammed his head into the camera and the feed went dark.

  
  


Byakuya had not been one for socializing the first time they were confined to this school for reasons beyond academics.

This time, however, he had a friend who needed him. It was a foreign concept, allowing himself to be weighed down by common people and their petty needs, but…

Kyoko was obviously distraught and for good reason. Her talent had failed in detecting the despair in their partner. 

He’d failed as well.

So, he rung the doorbell at her dorm room’s door.

At first it seemed like she wasn’t going to answer, but then the door opened and she was there.

She looked pale, her frown still going strong. “Byakuya.”

“Kyoko,” he echoed her simple greeting. “I just wanted to know what we plan to do about all of this.”

“...” her eyes narrowed. “There is no plan.”

“Then we better make one.”

She sighed and opened the door to let him in.

Byakuya took a seat at the table, watching as Kyoko began to pace with her hand curled up at her chin. She looked lost in thought, so when she finally spoke it was a surprise. 

“He thinks he’s going to lose us all, and has decided he would rather sacrifice us before that happens,” she said. “However, he seems just as happy experiencing the despair of losing us unexpectedly. I believe the environment in which he saw the killing video has influenced his perception of the world.”

“It makes sense he’d be thinking about loss,” Byakuya said. “I thought you were a goner too.”

Kyoko frowned. Thinking that she was the cause of this… no, she was simply a variable. Still, it didn’t feel good.

If there was a resolution to be had here, she would have to separate herself from the situation. She would have to approach this the same way she had approached the first game. 

“... I will contact you when I have a plan. For now, we better meet the others in the dining hall,” she said. 

“Ah yes, how I look forward to dealing with these cretins in a state of panic once more,” Byakuya sighed, and despite it all his purposefully bad attitude brought a small smile to her face.

However, that smile didn’t last, especially not once they saw what was going on in the dining hall.

“Kyahahaha!” Jill pointed her scissors towards Hajime and Nagito. “You two little despair junkies should have all the answers, huh? Huh? Why aren’t you dealing with this? Too busy jerking each other off to help?”

“... you’re the worst,” Hajime grumbled, seeming as exasperated with her as he was with most ultimates and their extreme personalities. 

“I’ll do what I can!” Nagito insisted. “Makoto’s life is far more important than my own… even if it costs me my life-!”

“Don’t start with that!” Hajime argued. “We’re done with that!”

“Just because you’re selfishly hung up on me, doesn’t mean you’re right,” Nagito replied coldly.

“Uh-oh! Trouble in paradise!” Jill cackled. “Should I cut one of ya now and make it quick before you totally turn on each other?”

“We’re not turning on each other!” Hajime cried out, and his voice was so desperate it made even Nagito pause. 

“... Hajime…” he said softly, reaching for his arm.

Hajime shook off his hand and folded his arms over his chest. “... we’re not turning on each other. We don’t need that right now.”

How was it that just a few hours ago he and Nagito had been chasing each other across the campus, joking and making each other laugh, just holding hands and feeling carefree? Now it was like it used to be. Everything felt cold and confusing. 

Nagito stubbornly reached for his arm again, and this time Hajime sighed and moved so he could take Nagito’s hand in his own. 

“Are we all on the same page now?” Hina asked, putting her hands on her hips. “Toko… Jill… back off!”

“Whatever, melons…” Jill huffed, tucking her scissors away.

“Why are you still doing that?” Hina huffed. “You like girls! You know that now! You don’t have to bully me for being-”

“Oh please, you’re not my type,” Jill snickered. “Just because you have tits to die for…” she blushed and squirmed.

“That’s enough,” Byakuya snapped. “If one more disgusting word passes through that fetid mouth-”

“You’ll punish me?” Jill laughed. “Oh boy! Really give Komaru something steamy to watch!”

“I never realized how much worse your group was than mine…” Hajime sighed wearily. 

“C’mon, don’t judge us based off Toko!” Hiro laughed nervously. 

“Everyone be quiet,” Kyoko ordered, and the room fell silent at her command. “We won’t get anywhere acting like this.”

“About that, I was thinking, don’t you think we stand a better chance of rescue this time?” Hiro asked. “I mean, the world is only half destroyed now! I bet someone is coming to save us!”

“I wouldn’t count on it…” Nagito sighed. “Despair is infectious… heavy… I wouldn’t be surprised if hundreds of people are now glued to their couches as they watch these events unfold.”

“None of that matters.” Kyoko shook her head. “What matters is that we can help ourselves. None of us here escaped our situations from help alone. We struggled and fought on our own whenever we had to. It’s up to us, we have to save and stop Makoto.”

She headed for the exit, and Byakuya followed behind her to take her wrist.

“Just where do you think you’re going?”

“To see Makoto,” she sighed. “He isn’t Junko Enoshima, he isn’t a mastermind, he’s our friend and he’s a little lost right now.”

“I’ll come with you!” Hina said.

Kyoko shook her head. “Too many people might overwhelm him, or make him think he has an audience to perform for. I’ll go alone.”

“Good luck,” Nagito chuckled hoarsely. 

“”Yes… that is precisely the problem,” Kyoko said, wondering if Makoto’s luck would protect him even like this.

  
  


Makoto was only a little surprised when he heard a knock on the headmaster’s office door. Then, not at all surprised when it was Kyoko who entered when he gave permission.

“You always did poke around every inch of this school, even when it was dangerous.” he smiled fondly.

“This isn’t a killing game,” she said.

“Not yet!” he corrected her eagerly. “I’m scouting students, remember? Don’t worry, I can do this!”

“No, I don’t think you can, Makoto.” she fixed him in her steely gaze. “I don’t think you’re really this kind of person. Not even in grief and despair. You’re not like her.”

“Not… like her?” he seemed a bit confused, then desperate. “If I’m not like her, then… what would the point of any of this be?”

Kyoko was about to answer that question when she noticed the abrasion on Makoto’s forehead. “Did you hurt yourself?” she asked softly, reaching her hand out to him. 

He looked back to her, and noticing her concern, he smiled. 

“You really care about me, huh?” he said. “People always accuse you of being unfeeling, but you probably feel the most of all of us. You just have control.”

He opened the drawer to the desk and pulled out a dagger, a souvenir from the past killing game. He held it to his own throat. 

“So, if I took away that control, would you despair?” he asked.

“Makoto… put that down.”

“You’re right, I’m not like Junko.” he pressed the blade against the skin, just a little. “She killed or tossed aside the few people that cared about her, then she was alone. She had to erase our memories to make us kill each other, give us motives that would only work on people who were strangers to each other. She didn’t know how to manipulate our bonds! But me?” he dragged the dagger lightly across his throat, just an inch, drawing a drop of blood. He heard Kyoko try and stifle a sound of distress, saw her hands curl into fists. “I know how to do that.”

“You need to stop this. None of this is you, we can still fix it at this point,” Kyoko said, voice strained. 

“Thank you for reminding me of who I am, Kyoko.” Makoto ignored her comment, undoing the stylish tie around his neck. “I was looking at this all wrong! I’m grateful to you, you really are very important to me.”

It felt sickening to hear those words coming from his mouth this way. Kyoko took a step closer and Makoto put the dagger back at his throat. 

“Uh-uh! Come too close to me and I’ll do it,” he said. “Go back to the others and prepare yourself. I want you to fight back with all the hope, and talent, and determination that Kyoko Kirigiri has. Besides, I need to start editing my plan! I need some space to think, you understand, right?”

She made a pained sound and took a step back. He nodded, and she eventually had to simply give up and leave. 

_ He’s still there. This isn’t despair, it's brainwashing, I can still save him. I just have to look at this from a different angle… _

Hajime closed the door behind him with his foot, his hands occupied carrying two plates. Dinnertime had come around, uneventful like everything was alright. In fact, the only worrying thing that had happened so far was that Nagito had gone to bed around noon because he’d felt a bit out of sorts. 

Hajime almost went to feel his forehead when he set their plates down on the nightstand, but then he wondered if it would be considered using his talents to try and take care of him. He frowned. 

“Why is it you always frown when I’m around?” Nagito joked, opening his eyes and stirring.

“Because you’re so good at making me upset?” Hajime teased right back. 

“I think maybe frowning is just your default nature.”

Hajime rolled his eyes and gestured to Nagito’s plate. “You should eat something.”

“So bossy.”

“Yes, I’m so overbearing keeping you alive.”

“I’ve always thought so.”

Hajime flicked his forehead and Nagito laughed. 

When he sat up it seemed to take effort, and Hajime felt himself growing worried despite how familiar he was with Nagito’s immune system.

_ About as strong as toilet paper after you’ve poured water onto it. _

“Just your luck you’d catch a cold during a killing game.”

“Count your blessings, it isn’t despair disease.”

“Still… inconvenient.” his hands twitched, and he started eating just to have something to do.

“But I wonder what good luck will come from it,” Nagito said. “Maybe… I’ll be able to save Makoto… wouldn’t that be an honor far above my station?”

“...” Hajime knew this song and dance. Nagito needed his elaborate set of rules and conditions to keep living. If the world was random and his luck was fixed then it would make every tragedy in his life his fault, and every bit of good luck an unfair reward. He’d become hyperfixated on hope and despair and self loathing because it made the pain dull, it made it easier to live with himself in a world gone to hell. Still… “Yeah. Maybe you could. You know more about hope than anyone except maybe Makoto himself, I bet you could do it.”

Nagito looked surprised, and blushed a little, squirming like Hajime had said something that made him nervous. “When you get nice… it makes me… kinda worry you’re catching my cold too,” he said.

Hajime rolled his eyes and laughed. 

Nagito tried to eat, but his gaze kept falling back to the bangle around Hajime’s wrist. Eventually he couldn’t help lifting Hajime’s arm so he could get a better look at it. “Izuru. He’s not you, is he?”

“Uh… not that simple, I don’t think,” Hajime said, looking thoughtful. “He’s me, and he’s not me, just like I’m him and not him. There’s bits of us that are all the same person, but we’ve started forming pretty unique identities. It’s like… sharing a mind but having different thoughts.”

“Chiaki told me something like that once,” Nagito said, and Hajime perked up with interest until Nagito spoke again and made him groan and roll his eyes. “ _ Kingdom Hearts _ . You know, with the Nobodies? You two are just Sora and Roxas.”

“I don’t think I ever got around to playing that one with her,” Hajime chuckled a bit stiffly. 

“I didn’t either, but she liked talking about it. She liked talking about all her games…” Nagito smiled sadly and Hajime sighed and nodded.

“Yeah. She did.”

Nagito noticed Hajime frowning like he was fighting back tears and he made a distressed sound. “I’m sorry! I made you think about something so painful!”

“There’s pain everywhere, Nagito. Can’t avoid it,” Hajime said, leaning in to press their foreheads together. “... just have to weather it with the people close to you.”

“That must have been Izuru speaking, because you just said something pretty smart,” Nagito teased.

“Believe it or not I think Izuru’s actually hibernating,” Hajime said. “I haven’t heard anything from that particular corner of my brain since I woke up like this.” he lifted the arm with the bangle. “I think it’s a precautionary measure. He’s taking a step back so we don’t accidentally slip up and use one of our talents.”

“So then once again I have feelings for a lowly reserve course student with no talent or purpose,” Nagito continued to tease, because it was easier than worrying about the fact that his boyfriend could die at any minute. 

“I’ll flick you again,” Hajime warned.

  
  


Hina had one thing keeping her together through all of this. 

The pool.

She swam laps until her muscles ached and she was dizzy, and then she swam to the shallows and sunk down until the water was up to her mouth as she sat and tried to calm down.

“H-hey… are you drowning?”

She opened her eyes to a familiar voice and sighed. “Toko? What are you even doing here?”

Toko crouched down at the side of the pool. “... No one else wants to hang out with me. W-which is fine, I don’t want to be around them either! B-but I was thinking it would be better to stay in pairs at least… so w-we know nobody is gonna try and kill someone else…”

“Do you always have to be so pessimistic?” Hina sighed. “... hey, you wanna swim with me? You’d have to shower first!” 

“You wouldn’t catch me dead in one of those slutty bathing suits swimming around getting sweaty and wet for no reason!” Toko huffed. “... I’ll just watch you swim.”

Hina sighed again and leaned back against the pool wall. “... you’re probably pretty relieved that Komaru couldn’t make it, huh?” she asked softly. “But a little scared too, right? You’re glad she’s out of danger, but you feel like you’d be stronger if she was here.”

“Don’t p-project your feelings onto me…” Toko sounded half-hearted throwing her barbs. “... but yeah. I’m glad she’s not here. She’d totally freak out.”

“It’s probably not easy for her to see her brother like this, and her girlfriend in trouble,” Hina said sympathetically. “Hey, when we get out of here, you better give her the biggest hug!”

“Don’t tell me what to do! I’ll hug her cause I feel like it!” Toko scoffed. “... I bet… your beefy girlfriend would be pretty worried about you too…”

Hina beamed at Toko being the closest thing to friendly as she probably could be. “Sakura will protect me! I know it!”

“Y-yeah, even from beyond the grave that ogre would do anything for you,” Toko agreed. “... Hina. Your uh… your brother?”

“Yuta?” Hina went wide-eyed. “What about him?”

“...” Toko puffed her cheeks out like she was pouting. “He did that same stupid thing you do to remember names. Just thought you should know, okay? Jeez.”

Hina covered her mouth, tears rising up in her eyes. “... I-I guess I should have guessed you’d met him… he’s the one who taught me that, you know.” she laughed a bit sadly. “You’ll have to tell me about meeting him sometime! Okay?”

“I rather not…” Toko went pale and looked away. “So, are you gonna swim o-or not?”

“I was taking a break! Jeez!” Hina huffed. “I was swimming for hours before you got here, I’m hungry now!”

“Y-you probably want donuts, huh? Typical!” Toko accused. “I saw some in the warehouse, I-I bet Makoto stocked them just for you. That idiot even cares when h-he’s trying to kill us!”

“You don’t think they’re poisoned do you?” Hina gasped. 

“How about you eat them and find out?” Toko taunted. 

“Maybe I will!” Hina pulled herself out of the pool. “I just can’t stand anymore bad days without swimming and donuts! I’m gonna have both! Even if it kills me! C’mon, Toko!” she grabbed Toko’s hand and started dragging her along. “We’re going to eat donuts together!”

“No way! Let go of me! Q-quit kidnapping me!” Toko protested the whole way.


	3. Naegi Productions Presents: Your Motive!

_ Ding dong, dong ding! _

“Attention, students!” Makoto said cheerfully, sitting in his desk chair with the Monokuma plush on his lap. He was back in his old clothes, hoodie and all. No suit, no Enoshima costume. “Please gather in the gym? I’m so sorry to wake you!”

The broadcast snapped off and all the TVs in the school went dark as one by one each member of the killing game groaned and slowly woke up at three a.m. to their friend mimicking their worst nightmare.

“It’s almost worse seeing him like that, isn’t it?” Byakuya said to Kyoko as they waited. “Back in his pathetic puppy dog thrift store getup. It makes it harder to believe he’s really trying to kill us all, makes it more surprising when he tries.”

“Hush,” Kyoko said, listening carefully to the sounds around her. Nagito and Hajime were coming late, just now entering. Then there was Makoto, waiting backstage. She’d heard him pacing a moment ago, and then nothing.

As soon as Nagito and Hajime had joined their ranks, however, Makoto revealed himself and took his place at the podium. 

“Sorry again to wake you at such a late hour,” Makoto said with a smile. “I was just struck by inspiration! I had to tell you all! I’ve finally figured out how to really get the most despair out of this situation. I had it all wrong! But Kyoko showed me the light.”

Immediately everyone turned to Kyoko looking confused, but she refused to react, just staring dead ahead at Makoto.

“So, that 79th class? I’m still scouting, of course. I’ve already got some applicants!” Makoto said cheerfully. “But having them kill you? That’s gotta be a last resort. It wouldn’t mean anything to see you die at the hands of some random killer. But at each other’s hands…?”

“Enough!” Byakuya shouted. “Stop behaving like you’re…  _ Her! _ ”

“Byakuya, you’re really rude for someone supposedly more cultured than the rest of us,” Makoto said frankly, making Byakuya make a surprised strangled sort of sound at finally being spoken back to by his most relaxed friend and partner. “But you’re right, I am acting like her. Because I’ve gathered you all here to give you your motives.”

Makoto stook a step back and gestured widely as two screens descended from the ceiling. On one screen was a recording of a boat docked in a harbor, and on the other was a figure sitting in a chair with a bag over their head. 

“For Hajime and Nagito,” Makoto said, gesturing to the first screen. “Jabberwock Island isn’t self sustaining yet, right? In fact, all the seeds and livestock you needed to start supporting yourselves in case of emergency were on this ship that I ordered to stay put back before this all began. Even now that the Future Foundation sees me in despair… do you really think they’ll be worried about feeding a bunch of Junko sympathizers especially after what they did to me? Their hope? You have some time, sure… but how long do you think? Kill someone and get out, get that food to your friends.”

Hajime and Nagito shared a glance, all too familiar with this kind of motive. 

“For Toko,” Makoto said, gesturing to the second screen as a masked man roughly pulled the bag off Komaru’s head. “I think this one is pretty obvious.”

“Y-your own sister?” Toko shouted, reaching into her pocket for a taser that Makoto had confiscated long ago. She growled with frustration as she realized she couldn’t use it, and simply grabbed the scissors she hated so much from her pocket to point at him. 

“Yes! Exactly!” Makoto clapped his hands together with delight. “Kill me or someone else and she’ll be safe!”

“I only see two motives there,” Kyoko said, brow furrowing.

“Of course,” Makoto said. “The third motive is a bit more abstract, sorry about that. See… I figured, trapped in here with a serial killer and two terrorists all motivated to kill… the rest of you wouldn’t need much more motive to kill and escape, right?”

“Please, none of us have been scared of Toko forever now!” Hiro said with confidence. 

“And what about Izuru Kamukura and the Servant?” Makoto asked, raising an eyebrow.

“W-well…” Hiro eyed Hajime and Nagito nervously.

“Hey!” Hajime snapped. “You’re not seriously suspecting us?”

“M-maybe he should be!” Toko snapped. “You two killed even more than me, and you actually  _ liked _ Junko and despair and all that!”

“Well, you may have a point, but I seem to remember you being pretty willing to do whatever it takes to protect Komaru,” Nagito pointed out calmly, running a hand over his legs where the scars still lingered. “If you must kill me, then go ahead! I’m sure her life is worth far more than mine.”

“Would you cut that the fuck out?” Hajime hissed. 

“Wow! Already descending into chaos!” Makoto said happily. “Thanks guys, it really means a lot to have you helping me.”

“You’re really gonna make us all go through class trials and everything?” Hiro moaned with fear. 

“Huh? No!” Makoto looked almost confused. “Course not! If you kill someone you just get to leave, and everyone else here keeps on living until the next killing. I want you all to do your best, I’d never punish a killer with the threat of death.”

“Makoto… this isn’t a well laid plan,” Kyoko pointed out. “You’re betting on people who have already bested death and temptation to fall to temptation this time. We’ve all already survived killing games and resolved within our hearts not to fall victim to them again.”

“Huh? You think so?” Makoto sighed. “Well… guess it will just be all the more painful when someone does slip then.” he smiled coldly. “I’ll just keep giving you more and more reason to kill, and when one of our friends finally snaps the rest of you will go along with them. I wouldn’t have so much doubt in these three. After all, they might resist for a few days but… weeks of their friends or lover starving or facing torture? I think they’ll break…”

“Then you don’t know us!” Hajime shouted, taking a defiant pose. “My friends… they aren’t the kind to die easily. They don’t need my help in surviving. So I’m not playing this game.”

After saying that he turned on the spot, heading for the doors.

“Hm. Guess he’ll take some convincing.” Makoto shrugged. “Oh well. Everyone go ahead and return to your rooms and get some rest, I have a lot more planned for you.”

He left soon after that, leaving the others alone to speculate. Toko noticed herself being given a wide berth, until Hina took her hand and nodded to her. They left the gym together.

Hiro followed Byakuya and Kyoko out, nervously asking them questions.

That just left Nagito alone where Hajime had left him. 

He watched the screens as they changed. The screen with his and Hajime’s motive changed to a view of their island from a distance, the sound of peaceful waves crashing against the shore.

The one for Toko only changed whenever Komaru moved to struggle or whimper.

He frowned. 

  
  


"He's totally chaotic and disorganized, it's not going to work," Byakuya said sternly, adjusting his glasses.

"He has people on the outside, that doesn't sound disorganized to me," Hajime argued. "And his plan to turn us against each other? He's really thinking about this."

"I suppose it might seem like a complex plan to your simple mind," Byakuya shot right back. "I'm not exactly afraid of  _ Hajime Hinata _ turning on me."

"No one's turning on anyone anyway, so let's focus on the friends that need our help," Hina interjected. 

"W… where's the Servant?" Toko asked suspiciously despite Hina's attempt to change the subject.

Hajime sighed. "Probably still in the gym… and don't call him that." He met Toko's gaze, only the threat of anger in his eyes. "I'd appreciate it if you guys didn't rile him up. We've worked hard on getting better, and it's especially hard for him. In a situation like this-"

"He might…  _ snap _ ?" Byakuya asked, raising an eyebrow.

"... you would know," Hajime replied casually, leaving to go collect Nagito.

He did feel a little guilty about that but… he needed to focus on himself and Nagito at the moment.

"Is it really okay to leave those two on their own…?" Hiro asked. "I mean, I don't wanna suspect 'em or anything, but…"

"I'll stay with them," Kyoko sighed. "If only to keep the peace."

"You shouldn't have to worry about keeping the peace right now," Hina said sympathetically, frowning.

"Unfortunately that's something we all have to be worried about." Kyoko folded her arms over her chest. "No one here has the luxury of stopping to feel."

"So what do we do?" Toko was running her hands half-frantically through her hair, her fingers catching on the tangles and working them loose. She didn't mention she meant specifically about Komaru, but it was obvious.

"... we take a deep breath and eat some donuts!" Hina clapped her hand down on Toko's shoulder. "Fifteen minutes to calm down won't hurt anything, and then when we've cleared our heads we can think about this."

"Heh heh, sounds good to me," Hiro agreed.

"That s-sounds like a terrible idea!" Toko huffed. "Don't you take anything seriously? … t-ten minutes is plenty…"

Kyoko sighed fondly, a bit of sadness in her smile. 

She was used to these people now. Used to their mannerisms, their idiosyncrasies, their presence in the room. She'd always held great belief in people, in how they felt, but addressing her own feelings was always difficult. It wasn't until she'd come to this school, found people just as peculiar as her, that she truly felt like she was part of a group beyond her family name. 

She… loved her friends. She loved Makoto, and knew that he loved their friends too. So it was imperative they get through to him. 

For now she'd promised to keep an eye on the Jabberwock visitors, so she left the chaos under Byakuya's tenuous supervision.

  
  
  



	4. dnuoF ,ylimaF

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From this point on things are going to get a bit intense, with talk of violence, self harm, and death, so please take care of yourself when reading!
> 
> And take care of yourselves in general, hard times out there right now, stay safe!

"You're making yourself into exactly the boogeyman Makoto wanted to make of you," Kyoko said, folding her arms over her chest. 

"Well it's not really on me if your friends think I'm up to no good because I'm staying in my room." Hajime shrugged. 

"You can't ignore your past, even if you've turned your attention to the future. You have a past that warrants caution whether or not that caution is unfounded."

"Are you all forgetting about this?" Hajime raised his hand to display the bangle. "I'm  _ not _ Izuru Kamukura, and even if that didn't sink in the first dozen times I said it in the program, I  _ can't _ be Izuru Kamukura right now or this would be killing me."

"How exactly are the two of you separated?" Kyoko asked curiously, her fist thoughtfully resting against her chin.

"... barely?" Hajime said with a shrug. "He's me, I'm him, and some days we're both just one guy and other days I can hear him being a dick in the back of my mind."

"I can't conceive of how you could exist together, considering his personality was just your mind wiped clean."

"I'm sure if he was around he'd explain it to you." Hajime shrugged again. "... we shouldn't be talking so loud." He looked over to where Nagito was curled up in bed. 

Having Kyoko in their room wasn't unusual at this point, she'd been following them around the past two and a half days. She told them it was to put the others at ease and because Hajime knew Kyoko didn't lie without good reason he figured either she was being honest or… she at least had a good reason.

So because Kyoko had been staying with them she knew how Nagito had been fairly despondent and fatigued. Hajime worried it could be his health, but he also knew firsthand how having your world turned upside down could make you want to just lay down where you were and let it all happen around and without you.

Nagito had been the one to pull him out of that trance. Without Kamukura's psychologist talents Hajime couldn't think of how he could do that for Nagito. 

_ That's probably just me though… _ he thought,  _ I should be able to be there for him as a partner, not as… the perfect talented human who can fix any problem. But I can't even manage that. I really am useless when I'm just Hajime Hinata… _

"Don't stop on my account, Hajime."

Kyoko and Hajime perked up from their private thoughts as Nagito sat up in bed. 

"I'm awake. I don't want your conversation to suffer for my sake," Nagito sighed.

"Enough with that talk," Hajime groaned and moved to the bedside. 

"You know your constant scolding really makes my self esteem flourish," Nagito retorted.

"... fair enough, but still, you need to keep it together."

"Right, because of how I've fallen apart in the past…"

"C'mon don't be like that…"

Kyoko cleared her throat to remind the quarreling couple they had company. She looked apologetic though, this did seem like something they needed to discuss. 

"Whatever. Let's get some breakfast." Hajime offered Nagito a hand up, which Nagito ignored.

"You two go on without me, I'm still feeling a bit unwell. I can catch up later. I wouldn't want to delay your meal."

"I'm supposed to be keeping an eye on both of you," Kyoko pointed out.

"I promise not to leave the room, there's nothing nefarious I could get up to in here!" Nagito smiled cheerfully.

"..." Kyoko hesitated reluctantly. "If you leave this room, whatever actions you take will reflect not just on yourself, but also Hajime. Do you understand?"

"Crystal clear!" Nagito's smile never wavered.

Kyoko nodded, and Hajime sighed.

"Be good," he warned.

"Oh, Hajime!" He laughed. "When's the last time I was bad?"

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Nagito left the room as soon as he stopped hearing Hajime and Kyoko's footsteps in the hallway.

Hajime and Toko would likely never act on these motives but… the risk was still there, and Nagito couldn’t allow either one of them to sully their lives with more killing. 

So he went to find Makoto. He wasn’t so bold as to think he could talk him out of all this, but he knew he could at least relate. Having your hope twisted to despair… he was the only other one who could truly understand. Maybe he could convince Makoto at least to… to… change his goals. Keep his despair filled actions as he fought for hope…

… all he could do was try, anyway.

He found Makoto in the gym where more decoration had been set up. He was sitting on a throne almost like he’d been waiting for Nagito to arrive. He was still in his casual clothes, but he’d put that crown back on his head.

He just thought it was a nice touch.

“Nagito!” he greeted him cheerfully. “What brings you here?”

“Hello, Makoto,” Nagito smiled and bowed his head. “I was hoping you’d honor me with a talk?”

“I always have time for my friends,” Makoto replied. “What’s bugging you?”

“Well, it’s the motives,” Nagito said, mouth dry as he tried to go back to his old ways. Manipulating and pulling strings was easier when all you had was your conviction and beliefs, not people you cared for counting on you.

“You don’t like them?” Makoto pouted.

“I just think… maybe all of this despair has no purpose?” Nagito said. “People will die, but they might not even be people you care about! If you really want to feel despair then-”

“Nagito, I’m really bored right now,” Makoto sighed. “I’m sorry, I just can’t pay attention to you at all. Hey, how about we play a game instead, huh?”

Nagito froze as he heard a familiar click, and saw Makoto pressing a gun to his temple.

“You like Russian roulette, right?” Makoto asked with a smile.

"You can't!" Nagito cried out.

"Huh? Why not?" Makoto asked with an innocent face.

"Our luck is different, you don't know for sure you'll survi-"

*click.*

He looked at Makoto in dismay.

"P-please stop." He took a step closer, and Makoto didn't seem to like that because...

*click* *click*

"Makoto!" Nagito froze in place like a scolded dog, balking.

"Hm, what was it you said...?" Makoto made a thoughtful face. "Oh yeah!" He aimed the gun at Nagito's foot.

*BANG!*

"My luck far outstrips your own!" Makoto said with a smile as Nagito collapsed with a cry of pain.

Nagito shakily got back to his feet, wincing and taking a slow step forward.

Makoto shook his head with a chuckle and pulled out a different gun, one fully loaded.

*BANG!*

a bullet connected with Nagito's leg, and he cried out and almost fell but focused on Makoto as he kept walking.

*BANG!*

Makoto had little to no experience with guns, but he was hardly aiming to begin with. Just frowning and punishing.

Still, when this bullet hit Nagito's shoulder, he saw something that deeply struck him.

Nagito braced himself, recoiling but gritting his teeth as he refused to back down. For one moment Makoto's vision blurred and showed him The Servant, eyes wild.

"You think if you say that the nature of life is to suffer then your suffering will be okay, but all it does is keep you from feeling pain that didn’t go away!" Nagito shouted. He moved quickly now, reaching Makoto's throne.

Makoto pressed the barrel of the gun to Nagito’s forehead, face deadly serious. Nagito panted, steadying himself as he looked up to meet Makoto's gaze.

"..."

*click!*

"Huh?" Makoto looked surprised. "Jammed?"

Suddenly the gun was slapped from his hand, and Nagito was yanking him from the throne to the floor.

"It was you... who taught me to value my luck... and my life," Nagito gasped.

He moved towards Makoto but stopped at the sound of bone chilling laughter.

"Aha... haha... puhuhuhu..." Makoto giggled, lying on his back on the floor, his crown rolling in small circles by his side.

Nagito felt sick, and then he felt dizzy as he fell to the ground. Belief and conviction had sustained him thus far, but his body was still only human and fragile. 

His body contorted, lungs gasping emptily for air as he went into shock. He trembled, pain filling every bit of his body. He knew what it felt like to die, he’d already done it once, and he knew he was doing it again. 

Oh well. 

At least he’d tried to help the people who mattered.

“Nagito!” 

_ Huh? _

He heard footsteps pounding closer and then felt himself being raised up into a pair of strong arms. From that point on being aware of his surroundings was simply too much.

Hajime stared down at Nagito’s limp body lying in his lap with horror. For a moment he had to close his eyes against visions of fire and blood. Then he made himself open his eyes again.

“Fuck it,” he hissed. 

_ You’re an emotional fool. Let’s do it,  _ Izuru answered from within him.

Makoto sat up with interest as Hajime stood, bringing Nagito with him as he ran from the room. 

“Huh… not giving up?” he said to himself.

_ Of course not! Hajime has the most reason to believe in the impossible and have hope for himself and his friends! He’s going to beat us, he’s going to win!  _ His inner voice cheered Hajime on.

“Shut up. Nagito is going to die, and Hajime is going to have to face it,” Makoto grunted, standing up on shaking legs. “Everyone ends up alone… we all die alone…”

He headed for the surveillance room, wanting to see how this turned out.

Hajime ran to the nurse’s office, keeping a lid on Izuru’s rising personality for the time being. 

There wasn’t much to work with, he ended up having to leave Nagito a few more precious moments longer as he went to search some ultimate labs before returning with what he needed. 

_ Be careful, _ Izuru warned, unable to assist him in anyway besides that as Hajime lowered the saw to his arm, just beneath the bangle. He was shaking, fear gripping him.

“If I… if I pass out, will you wake me back up?” he asked Izuru, swallowing and feeling sick. 

_ Yes. _

“Great.” Hajime closed his eyes and started the first cut downwards.

  
  


It was Kyoko who first noticed the trail of blood, who burst into the nurse’s office before all the others. 

“Hajime!” she took a step forward, eyes immediately taking in the scene. She saw a blood soaked room, Nagito bandaged and still lying in a cot, and Hajime standing nearby with suture thread between his teeth as he finished sewing up the stump at the end of his arm. 

No, not Hajime. It was Izuru.

“Oh my god.” Hina covered her mouth in horror, and Izuru’s eyes briefly moved towards the sound before flicking back down to their task. 

“Will he live?” Kyoko asked, her tone calm as she sought answers to her questions before anything else.

“Of course,” Izuru said, grabbing the gauze. “He’ll be fine. I am perfection, I do not fa-” he stumbled a bit, catching himself on the counter as he caught his breath. Hina ran over to help support him.

“We’ll take care of the rest,” Kyoko said.

“I don’t need help,” Izuru replied, stone-faced. “I am the ultimate-”

“You’re suffering from blood loss,” Kyoko said frankly. “And you’re emotionally involved in the situation. We’ll take it from here.”

Izuru sighed heavily before nodding, almost going limp in Hina’s grasp. She guided him over to the other spare cot, helping him to lay down as Kyoko took the gauze from his one good hand.

“This has gotten well out of-” Byakuya paused, aware of the irony of his words. “... hand. We need to stop this now.”

“I will stop it,” Izuru said, voice heavy. 

“Not right now you won’t!” Hina argued. “You need to rest!”

“Hmph” Izuru looked away.

“GYAH!” Hiro screamed, happening upon the hand Hajime and Izuru had removed in order to remove the bangle

Kyoko silenced him with a glare, and he soon found himself distracted by having to catch a fainting Toko.

“... you gave up a limb for him?” Kyoko muttered under her breath as she wrapped Izuru’s injury.

“What is the worth of a limb?” Izuru mused. “Insignificant. It can be replaced.”

“But he couldn’t be,” Kyoko looked over to Nagito. “I know what that’s like. To believe in someone so much… you would die for them.”

She felt a hand on her arm. 

“You will have to be more selfish in order to stop Makoto,” he said softly. 

"Bold words from the man who just amputated a hand for love," Kyoko remarked, though his words turned her stomach.

He wasn't entirely wrong.

She remembered when she planned to die for Makoto.

She had absolute faith in him. Makoto Naegi was clever, compassionate, sincere, and determined. His mind didn't come cold and calculating, his ability to solve a problem came from his emotions. He was the one who saved the world, and the one who would fix it.

That's what she'd always believed. 

Seeing him like this?

It was a testament to both of their selfless foolish actions. If she'd told him about her forbidden action…

… well he would have died for her and she couldn't have that.

But him watching that video?

… that video…

"Izuru. Could you replicate the technique used in Junko Enoshima's suicide video?" She asked.

"... yes? Do you plan on using it on Makoto?" Izuru asked. "Layering hypnotism on hypnotism won't fix him."

"Could it at least give us a temporary solution?" Kyoko pressed. "A way to neutralize him until we can better treat him?"

Izuru looked a bit unfocused a moment. Kyoko patted his cheek to get that blood loss attention back and he nodded.

"It could neutralize him," he said. "I'll need to get to the computer lab."

"We'll make it happen." She nodded.

"Well, now that the useful one is awake we stand a chance," Byakuya remarked. "... I seriously mean that. I know how my tone comes across but… I'm worried for him."

Kyoko took a deep breath and took Byakuya's hand.

"Just be ready to be useful yourself," she said.

  
  


Makoto tore at the walls, pulling down hanging portraits and striking out at knick knacks on the desk.

_ See? Hope, love, that's what wins! _

"No, shut up!" He wailed, covering his ears. "Everyone dies! Everyone leaves!"

_ You can't live your life waiting for the next bad thing… _

"Sayaka tried to frame and kill me! Kyoko wanted to die and leave me alone! Byakuya lied and cheated through a trial where lives were on the line!" He insisted. 

_ They needed help. They needed support. They needed hope. _

"Well what about  _ me?? _ " He shrieked, falling to his knees as the tears streamed down his cheeks. "I needed them… I needed them alive… I needed… hope. I need… I need my pain to mean something…" his voice fell to a whisper.

_ Pain is pain. It's how we respond to it that gives it meaning. _

"I don't want to hear from you anymore. Go away…" he sniffled. 

_ You're feeling grief… it's okay to feel grief… _

"No, really, I mean that. I don't want to hear from you." Makoto slammed his fist into the desk, coming back with bloody knuckles. "... so don't talk anymore… or I'll kill you."


End file.
